Airport 1970,

Minute 075: The Minute Waltz

November 11, 2016

Guest Host: Gerry Porter

Since seeing Raiders of the Lost Ark, Gerry Porter has been inspired to search the globe for rare antiquities. Actually drums. He’s known Indiana Jones Minute’s Tom Taylor since birth, and Pete Mummert since their days at Marshall College, and believes that in a fight between Han Solo and Indiana Jones, we all win (until we all lose). When Gerry’s not shooting craps with the “bad egg” Hovitos, he’s installing Xboxes in every hut and slipping “Fortified Sunny D Jungle Punch with Pampas Berries” into every thatched lunch box. Here’s a joke he just made up: Why did the teacher make Gerry rewrite his number line? Bad Eights.


Gwen continues to eavesdrop on Ada Quonsett, who’s talking to Mr. Davidson in 23-C.

“My late husband played the violin,” says Ada. “Not professionally, but he was very good. He once played the Minute Waltz in fifty-eight seconds!”

Gwen resumes her walk through the Tourist Class. She opens the curtain to the rear coat closet, and discovers Mrs. Quonsett’s coat, marked “23B.” Gwen closes the curtain, dumps Mr. Rathbone’s stale nuts in the trash, and pours a new serving in a ramekin. Gwen walks past stewardess Ruth.

“Nuts to the man in 21-D,” says Gwen.

“You said it!” replies Ruth.

As Gwen passes row 23, Mr. Davidson turns to Ada. “May I treat you to another sherry?” he asks Ada.

“Oh, no!” replies Ada. “One is really all I ever — well, thank you. You’re very kind.” Davidson reaches up and pushes the Call button on the overhead console.

Back in the cockpit, Gwen reports what she’s seen to the crew. “She’s there all right. 23-B. That’s why the head count was wrong.” She turns to Anson Harris. “What do you want me to do?”

“Nothing,” replies Harris. “If you start questioning her now, there’s bound to be tears.”

“We were asked to check,” says Vern.


In this minute

Jaqueline Bisset as Gwen Meighan
Peter Turgeon as Marcus Rathbone
Whit Bissell as Mr. Davidson
Helen Hayes as Ada Quonsett
Van Heflin as D. O. Guerrero
Ena Hartman as Ruth
Gary Collins as Cy Jordan
Barry Nelson as Anson Harris
Dean Martin as Vernon Demerest



Scroll to top