Airport 1970,

Minute 027: Hear That, Mr. Coakley?

September 06, 2016

Guest Host: Peter J. Regan

If you’ve ever stayed in a hotel with the new name of the hotel written on a bedsheet and draped over the sign with the old name of the hotel, thank Peter. He’s a long-time veteran of the hospitality resort industry, and makes sure your hotel experience is something to rave about on TripAdvisor. When he’s not complaining about the size of the bath towels, he’s expounding on what’s wrong with movies. Mark and Jim have known Peter since high school, and he’s always been like this. Except for the bath towels part. That’s new.


Tanya Livingston sits in a chair in the Trans Global Executive Lounge, while Mel sits opposite Mrs. Quonset on the sofa. Mrs Quonset is explaining the methods she uses to stow away on planes.

“I like to get to the airport early enough to get me a boarding pass,” says Ada.

“But our boarding passes are ticket folders!” says Tanya.

Mrs. Quonset nods. “Right, I know. I go to a counter and tell them I’ve lost mine and may I please have another one? I always pick a counter where the clerks are busy and lots of people are waiting. They always give me one.”

“But it’s just a blank folder – – it isn’t made out as a gate pass,” says Tanya.

“I do that myself in the ladies room,” says Mrs. Quonset. She reaches into her purse and pulls out a large pencil. “I know from experience just what to write, and I carry one of these pencils that the airlines use, in my purse. See?” She holds out the pencil, just in time for Tanya to snatch it from her hand.

“Yes, I do” says Tanya. “I’ll keep that, if you don’t mind.”

Ada frowns. “Well, it’s really mine. But if you want it, I suppose I can get another one.”

Mel leans toward the sandwich tray. “So now,” says Mel. “you have a boarding pass…”

“Well,” says Ada. “Then I go to the departure gate.”

Mel holds up a carafe. “Coffee?” he asks Mrs. Quonset.

“No, thank you,” Ada continues, “And I wait until the young man checking tickets there is busy, and I walk past him and onto the plane.”

“Do you hear that, Mister Coakley?” asks Tanya. Peter Coakley is shocked.

“But no one stops you?” asks Coakley, “Not even the stewardesses?”

“If you get on late enough –” says Mrs. Quonset.

In This Minute

Jean Seberg as Tanya Livingston
Burt Lancaster as Mel Bakersfeld
John Findlater as Peter Coakley
Helen Hayes as Ada Quonset



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