Airport 1970,

Minute 018: Drunken Dinosaur

August 24, 2016

Guest Host: Royana Black

Royana was born and raised in New York and has been acting professionally since she was 10. She now lives in Los Angeles with her husband and pets. She is super excited that Jim included her in this podcast!

Royana’s Official Site

Royana’s IMDb Page


Gwen and Vern are in Gwen’s crash pad apartment. Gwen is explaining about why the stewardesses were collecting liquor and glassware — Gracie is getting married.

“We’re giving her a party,” says Gwen.

“If you could hijack a 707,” says Vern, “you could start your own airline.”

“We thought of that,” says Gwen, closing her suitcase, “but none of us have a pilot’s license.”

“Well, with the kind of fringe benefits you girls have to offer,” says Vern, wiping a dish, “I can get you a crew right now.”

Gwen, in the other room, smiles, then gets the same faraway look in her eye she had earlier. She seems ready to say something, but pauses and says nothing. Vern turns out the kitchen light as they get ready to leave for the airport.

The scene switches to a traffic jam on a snow covered road. Two police cars make their way through the breakdown lane.

Patroni is in the middle of the traffic jam. He pulls a cigar out of his mouth and talks on a mobile phone.

“Mel? Joe. I’m stuck in traffic. On Carlton Road, just East of Mannheim. A tractor-trailer jack knifed and flipped over, and now it’s laying on its side like a drunken dinosaur.”

Mel, in Tanya’s Trans Global office, is on Tanya’s office phone. “Joe,” says Mel, “I need Two-Niner awful bad. Now if you’re not  out in fifteen minutes, call me back and we’ll get the highway patrol to bring you in.” He hangs up. “What else can go wrong?” he says to Tanya. “I’d better get up and check the Snow Desk. I’ll be back in time for his call.” Tanya blocks the doorway.

“You’re not going anywhere,” says Tanya. “You’re exhausted. You’ve been rushing around for three days.”

“I’ve got to get up there!” says Mel.


In This Minute

Dean Martin as Vernon Demerest
Jacqueline Bisset as Gwen Meighen
George Kennedy as Joe Patroni
Burt Lancaster as Mel Bakersfeld
Jean Seberg as Tanya Livingston

Weird Appliance Mentioned in This Minute

Update: Mystery Solved!

The appliance is a “Hamilton Beach Gourmet Center Power Unit” which had a lot of meat grinders and salad chopper attachments to plug into the front.



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